I Used To Be A Closet Dancer…

catchyourbreath

I used to be a closet dancer.

I would feel the rhythm
In my bones
To the music,
Turn it
Up
In the kitchen,
And exorcise the darkness from my soul.
There were a few long years when
I squashed down my joy.
I stopped moving.
I held my breath.
Because somehow
after experiencing
a traumatic event
in my life,
the lie that I bought was that
if
I moved
or
breathed
I would die.
And so
I froze.
I held my breath.
I stopped moving.
Trauma can do this to us.
The hardness of life
Can do this to us.
It can steal our joy.
It can program our brains to
Believe things
That
Aren’t true
And keep us in the past,
And hold us back
from all of the
Amazing Things
We are meant to be doing NOW.
The past four years have been life changing.
And the shift
started
with
Breathwork.
Connecting
to my spirit
Through the breath,
was like sweeping out my house
Of all the stagnant,
Heavy
Baggage,
That I had picked up over my lifetime.
The trauma,
The sadness,
The anger,
The grief,
The fear…
It was all like scar tissue in my body and soul.
And
The Breath
Began to break it up.
I felt it Loosen.
I felt my wounds
Begin to Heal.
I started living more fully
And a little more
Out
In the Open.
And because I had done
Such an extensive
Inner house cleaning,
There was Space
For
ME
To experience
So Much Joy.
My Spirit Started Dancing.
My new mantra became:
Breathe. Move. Breathe. Move. Breathe.
If you are reading this and feeling like
You wish you could
Experience
This kind of freedom,
Just know I feel you.
I have been there….
For what felt like
Ever.
If you feel
Stuck,
Hidden,
Squashed,
Unmotivated,
Afraid
Empty…
Just take a deep breath
And feel
How you
Can
Expand.
At first
You can feel
Silly,
Stupid,
Self-critical,
Or overly self-aware.
Just breathe anyway.
To be in these bodies is a privilege,
Even when
Our bodies at times
May have failed us,
Or have fallen sick,
or been weakened.
They may not look the way we want them to
Or do the things they used to do…
But –
They still carry our spirits inside.
And because of this,
It’s only
Right
to honor them
By
moving
and
breathing
and
dancing
And allowing them to
explore space
in the way they were created to explore and express.
I have to be honest.
I’ve never made a New year’s resolution.
Not for any particular reason,
I just never felt compelled to do so.
I never picked a word.
I never set a goal.
But this year I did.
The word I chose was
RE-AWAKEN.
And as I set out to reawaken and explore
More of who I am
and what I’m here to learn
And share,
I’m very much aware that part of this reawakening
for me
means to dance
In the Open
And not just
in my kitchen anymore.
Are there ways you might be squashing your light?
Are you keeping yourself really small
and safe
and hidden
and calling this living?
I invite YOU
To Come,
Dance,
Move,
Breathe,
With Me This Summer.
Take some time
To Expand
Explore
And take up more Space.
Take time to Heal.
Catch Your Breath.
Breathe your life.
*Spaces are Limited and are Beginning to fill, so if you feel one is for you, please reserve your place today, by clicking here:
With joy and gratitude in my heart for YOU.
April*
🙏💜

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